Boost My Iman

Entry #1 10/24/2014

قٌالَتِ الأَعْرٌابُ آمَنٌّا قُلْ لَّمْ تُؤْمِنُوا وَلٌكِنْ قُولُوا أَسْلَمْنٌا وَلَمٌّا يَدْخُلِ الإِيـمٌانُ فِي قُلُوبِكُمْ وَإِنْ تُطِيعُوا اللٌّهَ وَرَسُولَهُ لاٌ يَلِتْكُم مِّنْ أَعْمٌالِكُمْ شَيْئاً إِنَّ اللٌّهَ غَفُورٌ رَّحِيمٌ

“The Desert `Arabs (come to you O’ Muhammad) and say ‘We have true belief!’ Say to them (O’ Muhammad, blessings of Allah be upon him and his progeny) that, ’You are not true believers, rather you have only submitted (to Allah), since true faith has not yet entered into your hearts. However if you were to obey Allah and His Messenger (Muhammad, blessings of Allah be upon him and his progeny) then nothing would be reduced from your good deeds. Surely Allah is All-Forgiving, All-Merciful.’ ”

"Having iman means committing to a program of action. A Muslim who has iman does not merely believe in Allah, he or she commits to follow the commands of Allah in every aspect of life. Iman is key to success in the religious realm, but also in other areas."- Asad Jaleel (What is Iman?)

 As most of you know, I have been struggling with my iman recently. To give you all a little background and catch up, let's start from the beginning. 

When I converted, I didn't understand the importance of prayer. I had come to believe in something I never had before, so I was taking it one step at a time. The concept of God (Allah swt) still amazed me. As the months went on, I knew I had to learn how to pray. I didn't want to merely say I was a Muslim. I truly wanted to be one. 

In Islam we are taught our five pillars of faith....

1. Shahada (deceleration of faith)

2. Prayer (a solemn request for help or expression of thanks and worship to God, Allah swt)

3. Fasting (abstaining from food and/ or sexual relations, cursing ect.)

4. Zakat (obligatory charity)

5. Hajj (holy pilgrimage to Mecca)

My shahada was done, now I needed to fulfill pillar number two. 

Right before my first Ramadan (An Islamic holiday lasting roughly 30 days, in which Muslim's fast from sun up to sun down. Ramadan is followed by one of two Eid celebrations which happen a year.)

I wanted to learn to pray. I knew that this was a holy month that I may benefit from greatly since fasting and prayer go hand in hand. After learning to pray How I Taught Myself To Pray (YouTube Video) I found myself praying all but Duhr prayer (afternoon prayer, 4 Rakat) I worked during this prayer, and did not feel comfortable praying at my place of work either. I felt so great. I continued studying about my new found faith, and couldn't get enough knowledge. 

A few months later I noticed some of my prayers slowly slipping away from me. My husband kindly asked me about it, I didn't know how to respond. I felt a bit ashamed, and had no good excuse. I thank him for that because it was the boost I needed to start praying again. I soon changed stores that I was working in, and discussed with my boss about closing the store so I could pray while at work. He said that prayer comes first. AlhumdulAllah for a Muslim boss. 

Once I got pregnant the prayer struggle began again. I found myself so consumed with my pregnancy, prayer got pushed to the side. I continued to pray, but it wasn't the same. I've been struggling the most since than. In one of my recent "Mommy Monday's" I expressed my sadness for my lack of iman. Iman can be simply translated as "belief", but as stated by Asad Jaleel in the article above, iman is not simply "belief", it is so much more than that. It is not that my belief in Allah swt altered or weakened, it is that my obedience and submission to him weakened in my struggle to pray. Prayer is a very important aspect of Islam. Prayer is a part of my faith that I love and respect. No matter how good of a person I feel I may be, no matter how many aspects of Islam I do feel I follow, prayer is the connection to Allah swt, or creator, the almighty. After spending my entire life without Allah swt, losing my connection with him hurts my heart. 

So I decided to make this mission for myself, to improve my iman. Much too often we as Muslim's struggle in our deen on a daily bases. Without expressing too much sin, which may be sinful in itself. I wanted to share my journey with you in hopes that other woman may find inspiration to improve their own iman. I started out with compiling a list of goals. 

1. Establish regular prayer

2. Memorize the exact English translation to prayer to feel more connected

3. Learn Sunnah prayer 

4. Read Quran more regularly

5. Study more hadiths

6. Watch weekly religious lectures

7. Read Yasmin Mogahed's "Reclaim Your Heart" (had the book for over a year and only read one chapter...)

The goal list may continue to grow... 

I also recently watched a video from The Organic Muslimah https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gCFtAJXaiCw

She discuses the difficulties of being a mother and balancing our religious duties in everyday life. She mention all of the below information on her channel to help improve our iman.

1. Read Surah al mulk before going to bed :)
It is related in the Sunans of Imam al-Tirmidhi and Abu Dawud on the authority of Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him)I heard the Messenger of Allah (upon him be peace) saying, "There is a Surah in the Qur'an which contains thirty Ayat which will keep interceding for a man until his sins are forgiven. This Surah is `Blessed is He in Whose Hand is the dominion.' (Surat Al-Mulk 67).''In a lengthy hadith transmitted by Imam Tirmidhi on the authority of Ibn 'Abbas (May Allah be pleased with him) it states that the Messenger (upon him be peace) said,"It rescues people from the punishment of the grave." (See Tafsir Ibn Kathir)

2. Call your mother and father everyother day.

3. Teach yourself a new surah every month until Ramadan (5 Surahs)

4. Teach yourself two new du'as every month.Juwairiyah bint Al-Harith reported: The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) came out from my apartment in the morning as I was busy in performing the dawn prayer. He came back in the forenoon and found me sitting there and said,"Are you still in the same position as I left you." I replied in the affirmative. Thereupon the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) said, "I recited four phrases three times after I had left you. If these are to be weighed against all you have recited since morning, these will be heavier. These are: 
Subhan-Allah wa bihamdihi, 'adada khalqihi, wa rida-a nafsihi, wa zinatah 'arshihi, wa midada kalimatihi 
{Allah is free from imperfection and I begin with His praise, as many times as the number of His creatures, in accordance with His Good Pleasure, equal to the ink that may be used in recording the words (for His Praise)." [Muslim]

5. Pray all your prayers within a minute of their start time

6. Pray one sunnah prayer like Fajar this month, and then next month add another. 

7. Go to your favorite store and pickout clothes you would by for youself and see what the total would be and instead by childrens clothes and donate them to a local sheleter.

8. Pray fajr on time and then read Quran till Shuraq and then pray to rakah ( Hajj) 
"Whoever prays fajr in congregation, then sits remembering Allah until sunrise, then prays 2 rakats of salat has a complete reward of (Nafil) Hajj and Umrah. (The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) repeated the word 'complete' 3 times for emphasis) [Tirmidhi]

9. When you are praying make sure you understand every word you are saying the the salat within one month. 

10.Fast on Mondays and Thursdays or every 13,14,15. 

1 -- It was narrated from Abu Qataadah al-Ansaari that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was asked about fasting on Mondays. He said: "On that day I was born, and on it the Revelation came to me." Narrated by Muslim, 1162. 

2 -- It was narrated that 'Aa'ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was keen to fast on Mondays and Thursdays. Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 745; al-Nasaa'i, 2361; Ibn Maajah, 1739; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb, 1044. 

3 -- It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Deeds are shown (to Allaah) on Mondays and Thursdays, and I like my deeds to be shown when I am fasting." Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 747; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb, 1041.

1 -- It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: "My close friend [the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)] advised me to do three things which I will not give up until I die: fasting three days of each month, praying Duha, and sleeping after Witr. Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1124; Muslim, 721.

2 -- It was narrated from Mu'aadhah al-'Adawiyyah that she asked 'Aa'ishah, the wife of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), "Did the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) fast three days of every month?" She said, "Yes." She said to her: "Which days of the month did he fast?" She said, "He did not mind which days of the month he would fast." Narrated by Muslim, 1160. 

3 -- It was narrated from Jareer ibn 'Abd-Allaah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Fasting three days of each month is fasting for a lifetime, and ayaam al-beed are the thirteenth, fourteenth and fifteenth." Narrated by al-Nasaa'i, 2420; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb, 1040. 

4 -- It was narrated that Abu Dharr (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to me: "If you fast any part of the month, then fast the thirteenth, fourteenth and fifteenth." Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 761; al-Nasaa'i, 2424; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb, 1038.

So here we go... (update) I did start improving my prayer already alhumdulAllah